Trader Joe's Cold Pressed Avocado Smoothie

 "Ugh. Enjoy your salad dressing drink."

So sayeth my lovely bride. As if I wasn't already somewhat apprehensive enough about giving Trader Joe's Cold Pressed Cucumber Avocado Smoothie a try, though in retrospect, drinkable salad dressing does sound more appealing than gulpabe guacamole, though maybe only slightly. 

I like healthy things, generally, and using something like a banana as base for a smoothie like this sounds perfectly appealing. But...avocado? That throws off everything. 

Texturewise, it works, even better than expected once realized that cucumber was the base liquid. That took an extra second or two, but cucumbers are like mostly water, right? So it should work, and it does, albeit with definitely a lot of cucumber taste - believe it or not, right? There's enough other stuff to fill out the drink, like mango and spinach, that make the avocado literally blend right in. It's almost not noticeable except as a thickening agent and slight flavor contributor, emphasis on slight.

What IS noticeable is the lime. I mean, holy guacamole. Add a little touch of salt or spice and this would be practically a watery guacamole, with extra lime. It's so limey that the risk of scurvy probably just got kicked ten years down the road. If you don't *love* limes, this won't be for you. It's lime city, baby. There's a whole lime in here, and it tastes more like a whole grove.

There is a little sweetness which I presume would be the cherries, as it's not quite of the mangolicious persuasion. It..kinda works but kinda clashes with the overt citrus overload at the same time. And ginger? Not really there but seems more of an aftertaste, which is too bad as perhaps it'd be the ginger that pulls and keeps everything together.

In all, it's an okay drink. I'll definitely be full for the next couple hours. For what it is, and prices these days, it's not awful at somewhere in the $3 to $4 range. That being said, not sure I'd get it again. Too weird as a drink. Maybe more as a sald dressing would be the right idea. Apparently, according to my wife, there's some chatter elsewhere on the web that using this on chicken is pretty good? Maybe that'd work, I dunno. 

Double threes sounds two high, double two too low, so one of each.

Bottom line: Trader Joe's Cold Pressed Avocado Smoothie: 5 out of 10 Golden Spoons

Trader Joe's Grain Free Mint Flavor Dog Treats with Beet Powder

Nothing says Valentine's season like beet powder and mint. I mean sure, there's always candy and chocolate, but those things aren't good for dogs. What are ya gonna do?

Fortunately, Trader Joe's has treats with the beet powder and mint flavors dogs crave. Some of you probably realize I'm being facetious. Do dogs crave those things? I doubt it.

But they sure tolerate them, especially when they're all wrapped up in a crunchy, red, heart-shaped, chickpea-based dog cookie. They're perfect for gifting your beloved canines on Valentine's Day. We wouldn't want to leave Alfred and Sadie out of the festivities, now would we?

There's a nice pepperminty fragrance when you open the not-resealable cellophane baggie inside the box. The treats are a faint pinkish color, thanks to the beet powder, so there's no need to poison your pooch with Red 40 or anything like that.

The mint might be less for flavor and more to freshen your best friend's breath. And it did, at least a little bit. The Greenies we give our dogs once a day seem to keep their breath at least tolerable, but giving them a minty fresh breath boost once in a while is never a bad thing.

These snap in half easily and make pretty good bite-size treats for our small dogs after doing so. Both of the little fuzzballs chomped them up quickly enough and came around asking for seconds moments later, so they like them reasonably well, but I think they'll always prefer the softer, moister treats like the Better Than Leftovers in the end.

$2.99 for the box. Three and a half paw prints a piece for Trader Joe's Grain Free Mint Flavor Dog Treats with Beet Powder from Alfred and Sadie.

Bottom line: 7 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Incredisauce

It's really too bad that I seem to only get cravings for Chick-Fil-A on Sundays. Because...well...you know. 

But hey! Now I can skip the equally unfathomably long and quick drive thru lines and dip my tendies any time I want, close my eyes, and fool myself into thinking it's the real deal (or close enoguh to it) by busting out the new Trader Joe's Incredisauce!

Make no mistake: just as it was pretty clear that TJ's was taking on In-N-Out with the ol' Magnifisauce, it's obvious who the new target is. Superman's disembodied hand is holding a nugget there, after all.

And if you've ever had the Chick-Fil-A dipping sauce, this TJ's one is really pretty close. It's mustard based, primarily, but with oil and egg whites mixed in for some extra may-liciios body, There's tomato paste and garlic and onion and apple cider vinegar and...well, you can read the ingredients yourself, but it's almost not necessary as each are equally taste-able. It feels like cheating to just rehash the product's own description, but a little sweet, kind atnagy, and definitely smoky are all pretty apt descriptors. The real difference I could taste was the smokiness - seems amped more in the Incredisauce than the Chick-Fil-A if I'm recalling things correctly. 

Nutritionally speaking, this stuff is a disaster though. Added sugar. Soybean oil. All that salt. I mean, everything in moderation, so make out of that as you will. I'll try not to dunk and slather as tempting as that would be. 

Can't quite get the best pic of the ingredients and nutrition label - it's all pretty small - so here's the info from the official TJ's website. 

It's $3.29 for the bottle and should last you a while. Not a bad deal at all. Would definitely buy again any day, and maybe twice on Sundays. Double fours. 

Bottom line: Trader Joe's Incredisauce: 8 out of 10 Golden Spoons.