Trader Joe's No Bake Nut Butter Bar Mix

In addition to 80's movies, I'm also an appreciator of fine post-apocalyptic cinema—not just influential films like The Road and Mad Max, but lesser known indie flicks like Diani & Devine Meet the Apocalypse, Light of My Life, and EMP 333 Days. Speaking of EMP's, you could theoretically make these treats even after a massive electromagnetic pulse. No bake! I love it.

I mean, sure, they want you to put the mix in the freezer for 20 minutes to let it coagulate for a spell. But if it's winter time, you could just put the pan outside for a while to achieve the same effect. Also, some of you might argue that you'll still have the ability to bake in such a situation since gas lines will still function after an EMP. Sure, that will be true for a time, but unfortunately a long term grid failure will mean losing natural gas and running water soon after the electricity goes out.

But if you thought ahead, you'll still be snacking on Trader Joe's No Bake Nut Butter Bars. What a luxury these will be in the Apocalypse. Nut butters, honey, and maple syrup are all great things to stock up on.

The recipe calls for a cup of any nut butter of your choice and half a cup of either honey or maple syrup, along with the included mix. I used peanut butter and honey, probably the least exotic combo possible, but also quite possibly the safest. 

It turned out surprisingly well. I used chunky pb, which might have thrown off the intended solid to liquid ratio and made my mixture a little less viscous than it was intended to be. I found it hard to coat all of the mix with my pb/honey blend.

But they came out super crunchy, which Sonia and I both loved. The honey was more than adequate as a sweetener, and the mix added even more nuttiness to the flavor. Peanut butter was still the dominant flavor, but the almond, oats, and rice from the base could still be detected in the background. My favorite part of the Trader Joe's mix were tiny little spheres of what I assume are puffed rice..? They moved the texture even further in the direction of "bar," rather than "wad of edible Play-Doh," and added a crispness that's very pleasant.

Sonia seemed a little more captivated by the finished bars than I was. She thinks she'll make another batch with almond butter and maple syrup very soon. I'm sure they'll be at least as good as the first batch.

$3.49 for the mix. Will most likely be a repeat purchase. Four and a half stars from Sonia. Three and a half from me.

Bottom line: 8 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Non-Dairy Maple Oat Beverage

Ah yes, it's that time of year at last.

Warm summer afternoons fade into cool nights. There's small incremental tinges of oranges and reds and yellows in the leaves. The kids are finally back at school...kinda, but in our dining room...at least there's no mad morning rush to catch the bus this year...still, I digress. Crockpots are being taken out of storage, football is about to be back, and the Pittsburgh Pirates have a less than 1% chance of making the playoffs. All of these are sure signs that fall is peeking just around the corner.

I'm sure in the litany of this blog I've posted a lengthy tirade against pumpkin spice everything at some point. I lack the energy or desire to do so again. Plus there's too much other animosity out there these days. I've made my peace with pumpkin spice - if you enjoy your pumpkin spice lattes and enchiladas and TP and who knows what else, go for it, I won't be partaking so there's more for you.

And meanwhile I'll be focusing on maple. Yes, I know maple season is really late winter into spring when the sap is collected and boiled...but there's almost always more maple products this time of year. I guess it has something to do with it being a tree flavor.

New to the maple lineup this year is Trader Joe's Non-Dairy Maple Oat Beverage. granted, oat milk isn't the first thing I'd think to add a hint of maple too...but it's a good concept, right? Oatmeal by itself is kinda plain, but adding milk and maple syrup turns it into a verifiable treat. Now you can get some of the residual tasty treat without the big bowl of oatmeal first.

Or something like that. Indeed, that's really what the TJ's maple oat beverage tastes like - the milk left over in the bottom of the bowl of oatmeal with maple syrup and milk. Less chunky, of course, and that's a good thing. It's still creamy, however, like a decent "regular" milk but with a slight touch of graininess mixed in. It's neither distracting nor unpleasant, but occasionally noticeable.

The maple flavor itself is actually scarcely more than a small hint. I think that adds some versatility to the product - use as a regular drink, pour over a wide variety of cereals (not Pumpkin Spice O's though), add a splash to coffee instead of creamer and sugar. The maple beverage isn't an all out maplicious sugar bomb of a treat, but more of a subtle pleasure. Me personally? I'm not much of a milk person in any way, shape or form, so while I've tried it I'm not going to be guzzling down this beverage by any means. But it's still a legit treat. Gotta love anything maple.

My lovely bride is more gung-ho than I. She's been scheming different ways to use the milk, as well as already lamenting its eventual seasonal rotation out. Til then, she'll be using a lot in her coffee as she helps oversee a couple kids navigating elementary school on Zoom calls and iPads. You know, like the good ol' days. Or something. Her only maple oat drink-related wish would be for it to be a touch more maple-y, but she's in love as is. Four from her, and I'll tack on a few of my own.

Bottom line: Trader Joe's Non-Dairy Maple Oat Beverage: 7.5 out of 10 Golden Spoons