Trader Joe's Reduced Guilt Chicken Salad

When I'm eating a piece of meat, be it chicken, steak, or what have you, I never want to see actual fat. I hate it. I've always been repulsed by the sight of real animal fat. I'll cut it off, I'll feed it to the dogs, or I'll just leave the fatty portions on my plate. Likewise, I've never liked things coated with grease or lard. If there's excess mayo on a sandwich, I'll scrape most of it off. I'm the weirdo that uses two or three napkins to sop grease from the top of a piece of pizza. Other people see me doing it and they say, "Why are you doing that? The grease is where all the flavor comes from!" Maybe so. But I prefer it without the excess grease.

However, all that being said, I must point out that when fat is seamlessly blended into a product, be it a doughnut, milkshake, cookie, or delicious chicken salad, I eat it up like it's going out of style. And not only that, but I'm usually actually turned off by lower-fat, lighter options of the same products. This chicken salad is no exception.

It's not really terrible, though. In fact, Sonia loved it. But I'm going to immediately compare it to the two best chicken salads I've ever had, Wine Country and Curried White Chicken Deli Salad, and find it wanting. The only ingredients that are comparable between this and the wine country salad are the white meat chicken pieces and the celery bits. I'm not sure how, but I feel like even the celery flavor is more enjoyable in the wine country option. The carrot bits in this dish add some pleasant crunchiness—but very little in terms of flavor. I must admit, though, that the chicken in this reduced guilt salad was good white meat, and it was relatively moist and had a nice texture. 

Furthermore, in this product's defense, the difference in fat content is astounding. We're looking at 2.5 grams of fat per 99 gram serving here, whereas the wine country salad has 11 grams per 113 gram serving. That's something like 1/4 the amount of fat, plus there's less than half the calories. This isn't one of those situations where TJ's cleverly changed the container size and serving size by a third and then boasted "33% less fat!" There's a marked difference here. The problem is you can taste it.

Or rather, that you can't taste it. I think it's bland. A bit of mustard certainly does this product a service. The chicken is okay as I mentioned before, but in the end, I think I'd rather just buy my own lean chicken breast, some lettuce, and some Miracle Whip and make my own low-fat chicken sandwich—and at $4.49 for a small tub of this stuff, you could probably assemble those three ingredients for less money.

Sonia gives this product four stars and says that it's a great, healthy alternative if you don't want all the fat and calories in the wine country chicken salad (which she insists on calling "Sonoma Country Chicken Salad." She's so cute). I think it's worthy of three stars—not exactly a treat, but it's amazing they cut such a drastic amount of fat and calories and still yielded something that's even edible.

Bottom line: 7 out of 10.

Trader Joe's Key Lime Tea Cookies

As you may have heard on our recent episode of Let's Talk TJ's, it's probably a good thing Nathan got to the review of the Popcorn In A Pickle first. It's not that I didn't like it...it's just that I wasn't anywhere close to as enthused as Nathan, Sonia, and apparently everyone else on this planet of ours. I feel like if I had written the review and said anything even slightly  negative, it would've gotten a tremendous backlash, and well, we try to keep it friendly here folks. We really try to be an oasis away from all the other noise out there and to just be positive. The world doesn't need much if any more angst, acrimony, or snark...okay, guilty of the last one occasionally...but we want to be a lighthearted diversion.

For a similar reason, good thing I'm writing this review on Trader Joe's Key Lime Tea Cookies. The Rodgers weren't terribly sold on them - too strong flavor, too much powdered sugar, etc etc. Me? Listen: I've spent the past year or so finally cultivating some sense of self control for the first time in my adult life. I threw it completely out the window when it came to these cookies.

Not gonna lie: I basically ate the whole package myself. Over several days, yes, but man, what a glorious run these were. Every cookie seemed better than the previous - the crumbly texture of the cookie middle, the quickly intensifying lime flavor in all it's soursweet citrusy glory, all of the sugar adding a sweet balance. Oh goodness.

Make no mistake: these key lime cookies pack a wallop that honestly I didn't expect. Biting one in half to take a look at the cross-section reveals a little magic while adding to the mystery - the cookies is composed of basically 90% cookie bases, with a thin (maybe half to a full millimeter) sugar coating similar in appearance and feel to a Muddy Buddy (except a little bit more) with a confectioner sugar dusting. It's in that thin sugar coating that all that key lime flavor is contained. How? I don't know. All I know is I would eat and eat these until my lips and mouth began to hurt, like I had too many Sour Patch Kids or salt and vinegar chips - maybe it's just me, but I love that sensation. Amazing cookies, in my opinion.

As for Sandy? Well, I think she may have gotten a couple of them, if any. I asked for her take, and about all she said was "I bet they tasted good." What I do know is she really liked TJ's key lime pie (which these were very similar in taste to sans gingery crust) so if given a fair chance to adequately assess these cookies, I can't imagine her going lower than her score on that. For me? Just two small quibbles: There is a lot of sugar dusted on top, perhaps a little too much here and there - I coughed out a dust cloud or two, but that may have been more my excess than potential cookie foul. Also (and Sandy and I share this) - no idea what kind of tea to have with them. These are too potent to pair up with many teas - have a suggestion? Share it! Regardless, I'm going near-perfect here.

Bottom line: Trader Joe's Key Lime Tea Cookies: 8.5 out of 10 Golden Spoons